Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Blame it on the Crack

Last night David & I put the kids to bed, and Luke said (in his sweetest voice), "Mama fweep wiff me a minute, peeeeeeas."  I couldn't say no.  Sweet moments can be rare for my two year old, and when he wants to "nuggo," well that's just what we do.  I snuggled up to my Lukey, and Lance got Daddy by default (there is only one of me after all).

Daddy hopped in Lance's bed, and Lance started yelling at him & kicking him.  Fighting, crying, & screaming are all normal when Daddy's around since he takes great pleasure in tormenting the boys by trying to mess with the way they do things.  For instance, you might think the world was coming to end (at least in our house) when Daddy switches the sippy cup lids so they don't match the cup, but Daddy thinks it's hilarious.  And when Mommy just wants peace & quiet at the end of the day, Daddy incites a riot by insisting Lance wear pajamas that are clearly Luke's.  Lance's attempts at correction are met by Daddy playing dumb.  World War III ensues, and Daddy laughs...and laughs...and laughs.  Daddy's favorite way to make Luke go berserk is to pretend he's beating Mommy up. Luke will start to cry and then try to save his beloved Mama by beating up Daddy.  And another way to bring on the wrath of Lance...try to sleep in the crack of his bed (you know, between the wall and the mattress).  This is what happened last night.

David jumped in the crack & then laughed while Lance went crazy.  After he assured Lance he wasn't after the prime sleeping spot, he says to Lance, "When I was little and kids would ask me how I ran so fast, I would tell them it was because I slept in the crack." I got a serious case of the giggles when I heard that.  And then he said, "And you know what?  I really did believe it."  More laughing.  "No Rachel. I mean it. I told the kids, and then this other kid who ran even faster than me said that he slept in the crack, too!"  Then it must be true. ;)  I'm not sure, but I think David still believes that sleeping in the crack made him fast.  At least he was little when he thought that one up.

I remember in high school there was this Japanese foreign exchange student who ran track.  He was pretty fast, and he told everyone that it was because he ate bananas.  And he was dead serious.  We all thought it was really funny, but I bet there was one or two runners who downed the bananas before a big race (just in case).  I didn't actually try out the theory.  But now that I think of it...I definitely should have tested it.  Couldn't have hurt.  Might have helped.

The banana idea came from a high school senior.  The crack concept came from a little kid.  Okay, I don't really know how little.  But at least David had back up on his theory.  I mean, there was that other fast runner who, coincidentally, slept in the crack, too.

8 comments:

Lora said...

Yay another post!! :)

Question, why did David sleep in the crack? He didn't have to share a bed with anyone did he? hhhmmm I can't remember.

Now I did sleep in the crack, and come to think of it I was pretty darn fast as a kid :)

The Lawn Ranger's Woman said...

Bahahahah. Thanks for the new post. It made my whole day. I'm gonna move my bed against a wall just so I can test out the theory. Oh, and tell that mean daddy to quit teasing my handsome boys. Sending big kisses to my Wancey and Wuke :)

judy moesser said...

Wow, it made him run fast. And I always thought it was his OCD that caused him to not be able to sleep anywhere else and it doesn't sound like it runs in the family. Just kidding. Love your posts and your family.

Steph said...

Why do men like to harrass their children? Is it how they get attention? I don't know but that is a pretty funny story. Why would you sleep in the crack? That can't be comfortable.

Crystal said...

Yessss! Another post from one of my favorite authors. Thanks for the giggles...the Shelley family NEVER disappoints:)

Jeep and Nisha's Family said...

Great story! I never did try the banana theory, but I will try sleeping in the crack. Thanks for the laugh!

Grandma 'D' said...

Sounds like David has been on the Crack too long....get off the crack David...Or one Day our little Lance will be a Crack abuser too:)

Crystal said...

I sure did copy your back ground....must not have remembered what it looks like -- 3 month old blogger:(