Friday, December 24, 2010

Naughty or Nice?

After Lance & Luke told Santa what they wanted for Christmas, Santa asked Lance what he was getting his brother for Christmas.  Lance thought for a second & replied, " be nice to my brudder."  Definitely nice.

Luke is two.  All two year olds are naughty by default.  I think that makes them exempt from "the list."  They get presents just because they are cute.  Cute apparently negates naughty.

As for Daddy...
I've convinced the boys that Daddy is naughty & Santa is bringing him a lump of coal. :)  I asked the boys if they wanted to help wrap a present for Daddy.  Lance told me Daddy wasn't getting any presents, just coal.  And as much as I like the idea, what if Santa actually brings presents for David?  I can't have the boys thinking Santa brings presents to naughty boys (what will I hold over their heads all through the month of December?).  Daddy better be awful nice today!  He's got a lot of ground to make up.  What's that?  What makes David naughty, you ask?  Let's see...
  1. "Wow Luke!!  Those are some thick thighs!  Just like Mama's."  REALLY DAVID???  Haven't we already gone over this--this exact statement???  No wife, and I mean NO wife, would let her husband live after a comment like that!!  Definitely naughty.  I don't care if it's the truth.  Naughty.
  2. "You look really nice, Rachel."  Hmmmm, doing better.  "Except for your hair."  I think the second statement cancels the first.  Naughty.
  3. When I pulled out the Christmas ornaments this year, I found tiny round holes in some of the balls.  I was baffled.  But wait!  Do you remember a post about David & his BB gun?  And how I found out he had been shooting it INSIDE the apartment?  Mystery solved.  Naughty.
  4. Then there were the wooden TV trays that looked like they had been stabbed with a knife a few times.  But it wasn't knives.  It was from ninja stars that had been thrown in the apartment.  I don't think David gets the whole indoor vs. outdoor activity thing.  Although I'm pretty sure ninja stars shouldn't be thrown anywhere.  Unless you're a ninja.  David isn't one.  Naughty.
  5. Then there are the numerous toys broken by Daddy (because he was doing something he shouldn't), and all the times he has thought it was funny to make the boys cry.  And about a gazillion other naughty things.
I guess he has done one or two nice things this year.  I still think David making the nice list is a long shot.  He probably thinks the same of me--I won't go into details. :)  But I know Santa really well.  I think I'm good.

**Christmas Update**
Santa apparently thought David was good.  But somehow the BB gun made it's way out Christmas morning.  And I found a BB embedded in the wall of the sitting room.  Don't worry.  David assures me he will paint over it.  


Melissa said...

He would have totally made the naughty list after reason #1... you didn't have to list five reasons. Give naughty David a big punch in the nose and then you probably ought to kiss him too. That might help stop the feelings to beat him with a club :) As for those sweet boys, I wanna steal 'em! They are just so handsome! Love you guys! Merry Christmas!!

The Lawn Ranger's Woman said...

I had to read this out loud to Dustin because it was so hilarious! On a side note, "naughty" could be good (wink, wink). Oh, and I love the Shelley Family more than Christmas morning!

Granny Annie said...

Your blog put such smiles on our faces!...maybe you should put our special David in time out! make him stand in the corner or go to his room when he is naughty! That way the boys wouldn't think you play favorites!
Love all of you...and hugs to you all! especially "naughty" David! who is just one of the boys! fun daddy!