Potty Training...Sucks!

I'm sooooo tired of changing a gazillion diapers every day. We've tried potty training Lance, who will be 2 1/2 in just a couple days. He can hold it for HOURS (no kidding). We'll put him on the potty all day long, sometimes every 5 minutes. And wouldn't you know it...he pees in his underwear the second he's off the potty. This happens over & over & over. I get frustrated & go back to diapers for a couple days because I'm all worn out & tired of the fight. Go ahead & judge me. I know I shouldn't go backwards & go back to diapers, but whatever--what's done is done. I was pretty happy that we've never had a poopy underwear accident. Which is why I got brave & just said no more diapers.

Which brings me to yesterday. I'm really tired of Lance taking off his own diapers. I always freak out thinking that he could be taking off a poopy one & we'd have a big mess. So...I decided to just put up with the accidents & tantrums & just say no more diapers. We were accident free at about 10 am (but still no pee in the potty). I put Lance in the bathtub and ran to get Luke to bathe him as well. I was gone for mere seconds when I hear, "Mommmmy!" And then because I didn't respond quickly enough, "Wayshel!" Yes, he called me by my first name--little stinker! I rapidly return to the bathroom to find him standing in the tub and.....ewwwwww.....a couple floaters......so gross.....yes, poop in the bathtub. And Lance says to me, "Peed on da gwound." No son, Mom would actually be okay with pee on the ground. This is definitely not pee on the ground!

It took me a while to clean up the mess, re-bathe Lance, and disinfect the tub & every toy in it. While I was cleaning, Lance peed his pants. He brought me new underwear, we got him changed & everything cleaned up, and we both plopped down at the table--Lance for a snack, me for a break. Seconds, and I do mean seconds, later, he said, "Uh oh," and I followed his gaze to the chair where he was now squatting over a puddle. I crossed my fingers & silently pleaded, "Please let it be water, please..." nope, it was pee. I half sighed, half growled and resisted the urge to scream. By now I was praying that Lance would get tired very soon, so that I can put a diaper on him & put him down for a nap. I know, not the best move. Maybe Lance has a strategy. Maybe he knows he can wear me down if he has enough accidents. He had one more accident--on the suede couch--before nap time. And then I had a blissful 2 accident free hours while both boys slept.

I'll spare you the afternoon accident details and just jump forward to this morning when I got out of bed because Luke was awake & crying. Let me just say that I had no idea Lance was awake & up & about already. But as I walk down the hall to the boys' room, lo & behold there is a little toddler walking back into his bedroom. With sweat pants on his head and a bare butt. Where did this kid come from? I laughed for about half a second until I realized that his little naked bottom meant he had taken his diaper off. Hmmmm....and what was that I smelled? Oh yes, if you guessed poopy diaper you were right. He had taken his poopy diaper off & was in the process of finding some underwear & pants. And he must have been sidetracked by his own hilarity with his pants on his head and all.

Okay, now I am definitely POSITIVE that it is time! I have been trying not to make potty training an unpleasant experience for him, but whatever...that is all out the window now. Now all I'm thinking is that this kid better learn to use the potty soon!! And wouldn't you know it he pooped in his pants right away. So being the mean mom that I am, I made him sit on the little potty for about half an hour--him screaming the whole time. I knew he was holding it, and I also knew that his crying might distract him. And it worked!!! He was distracted enough that he began peeing. On me! But I was so darned excited that I didn't even care. I helped him aim, and we were both so pleased with the pee in the potty.

There was much clapping & dancing & hugging! And treats! He can have whatever he wants. I know I'm going a bit over board, but again...whatever. I am so thrilled that he peed in the potty. And now he's waking up from his nap, so we get to start all over again. Oh, the joys of potty training.